The Heroes Of BYU
Posted By Eric Ethington (Author) on February 4, 2011
Provo, UT – What happened to me afterwards aside, the people I found last night on the BYU campus were no less than heroes. 30 students dedicated to ending discrimination and bullying both at BYU and in Provo.
Outside of Utah, you may not understand the difference between Salt Lake City and Provo. True they’re both still Utah in all its quirky glory, but SLC is by far the progressive hub of the state (by our standards) while Provo is still the center of conservatism and bigotry.
So while being an activist in Utah is hard enough, I’m frequently reminded how much easier I have it living in the capital city rather than 30 miles to the south. But last night I met some people who beat down the odds, and are working to make both Provo city and Brigham Young University just a little safer.
When I caught wind of a group of BYU students meeting to discuss the non-discrimination ordinances, I had to attend. I figured that whether they were pro or con, it should be interesting. I wasn’t disappointed. What I found was a small group of mostly straight Mormon students discussing what they can do to get the Provo City Council to pass non-discrimination ordinances, which would prevent discrimination in workplace and housing based on sexual orientation or gender identity.
They explained how their first attempts, to get businesses to sign a letter of support, hadn’t gone well. Several businesses, such as Nu Skin, were supportive but were unwilling to sign on to the letter. Without skipping a beat, the group has decided to switch tactics and model what was done in Logan to pass the same laws. They’re organizing a letter and email campaign among the students of BYU and residents of Provo which will be sent to the Provo City Council and the Mayor.
Marshall Thompson
Of course they’re putting a true Mormon twist on their plans, each member of the team have assigned themselves to one of the council members in order to “shepherd” them through this like any good “home teacher.”
Organizer Marshall Thompson is a 1st year law student at BYU and just moved down with his wife and 2 children from Logan. “The way our society teats people matters immensely,” says Thompson, “I’m just not comfortable living in a place that treats people unjustly.” The newest member of the group is 22 year old Sally who moved to BYU 5 years ago from Fairfield, California. She was invited to the group by a friend and says she has many friends at BYU who are both open and closeted. “I was very torn by Prop 8,” she says, “once you see people as human it’s hard to discriminate.” And of course, I have to give a shout out to BYU student Cary, one of our loyal PRIDEinUtah readers who was also at the meeting!
Once that meeting ended, I found myself invited to meet with a gay straight alliance on campus. Yes… you heard that right. A gay straight alliance on the campus of BYU. I was blown away myself. They call themselves the USGA group (Understanding Same Gender Attraction) and are not offically recognized or sponsored by BYU (obviously) but they still meet on campus. Imagine my shock when I walked in and found 30 students who meet regularly, many of whom are openly gay.
BYU’s honor code states that someone can be gay, lesbian or bisexual (not trans though) openly, as long as you have zero physical intimacy, including hand holding, with members of the same sex either on campus or not.
The group last night watched “For The Bible Tells Me So,” a documentary about what it is like to grow up and come out as a homosexual. I will admit that I was in tears by the end, thinking what these kids must go through and how amazing it was that they even existed.
Of course my tires were slashed while attending the meeting, but apart from that… I can’t think of a better way I could have spent my night then at BYU with these courageous people. Maybe there really are angels, I’ve met a few.
I didn't actually ask permission to take this picture, so I've blocked out faces
"Eric, trying to have this (civil rights) conversation with you is ultimately like trying to teach a pig to dance, it just annoys the pig. So Eric, sorry to annoy you."
-Paul Mero, The Sutherland Institute.
What beautiful people they are.
Another fantastic cover story Eric. ss abt ur tires. at least they didn’t take it out on you…and ur safe.
[...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by utahpolitics, Dennis Veite and Bryson White, Eric Ethington. Eric Ethington said: The Heroes Of #BYU http://bit.ly/i8X4PM #lgbt #utpol [...]
Eric, thanks so much for coming, and for your kind words at USGA. Sorry again about what happened to your car.
I know we haven’t really had a chance to get to know each other yet, but I hope you’ll bear with me if I speak my mind for a second: I don’t agree with the statement about Provo being “the center of conservatism and bigotry”. It’s a sweeping overgeneralization. I’m saying this as someone who attended BYU as an openly gay student (for about 8 months), who was respected and never harassed even once because of my orientation.
And I’m not denying that some people in Provo say and do bigoted things. But to take that and say, “Fuck Utah County” — that’s regionalism. That’s discrimination. And it does your cause no good. I mean, if you found out that a black person had slashed your tires, would you say, “Fuck black people”?
I think to make progress, we need to be careful to be very precise in the things we say. It’s awesome to be passionate about equality! But to win hearts we need to be loving and civil and conduct ourselves in a way that earns people’s respect. It’s easy to fall into the trap of creating our own “hated other”, just like “For The Bible Tells Me So” talks about. If Utah County, containing a whole class of people most of whom we even don’t know, becomes our “hated other”, isn’t that prejudice just as bad as homophobia, racism, or anything else?
Thanks for attending Eric, I was glad you came. You’re welcome to come back as well.
Eric, thanks for sharing your experience. I’m glad I happend upon this site and your experience. Years ago I attended BYU and nothing like this would have ever been tolerated. The man I fell in love with at the Y was gay and I cannot imagine what life was really like for him in Provo. 35 years later he is out of the closet and an activist and married to his life partner and we are still great friends! But when I think of all the religious guilt and judgements that are passed along on people who are just being themselves, it makes me so angry.I wish I was still in Ut valley so I could become involved. It’s about time that good folks should not have to defend or hide their sexuality just to make others feel good about their beliefs.
That’s a wonderful attitude to take Mary! Thanks for your comments.
Great post, Eric. I believe in angels… sound like you met some!